Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption & Foster Care

How to Adopt from Foster Care While Living Abroad - Weekend Wisdom

Creating a Family Season 18 Episode 92

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Question: My husband and I were foster parents in the US, and have since relocated to Denmark for his work. We both still feel called to adopt from foster care, and would like to do that from the US. We know that the US and Denmark are both members of the Hague Convention, and can adopt from each other. You have great resources about international adoption, but usually from the perspective of a person in the US adopting from a foreign country. I'm wondering if you would consider doing a podcast episode on the process of a US citizen habitually resident in a foreign country adopting from US foster care. 

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Please pardon any errors, this is an automated transcript.
Welcome to Weekend Wisdom by Creating a Family. This is our opportunity to answer
your questions. Each week we tackle one question that you guys have sent in, so
please send us your questions to info @creatingafamily .org.
We'll jump right in to today's question. My husband and I were foster parents in
the U .S. and have since relocated to Denmark for his work. We both still feel
called to adopt from foster care and would like to do that from the US. We know
that the US and Denmark are both members of the Hague Convention and can adopt from
each other. You have great resources about international adoption, but usually from
the perspective of a person in the US adopting from a foreign country. I'm wondering
if you would consider doing a podcast episode on the process of a U .S. citizen
habitually resident in a foreign country adopting from the U .S. foster care. Also
any resources you might have. Thanks for all that you do. Well, you ask a good
question and one that I don't have a lot of resources on. However, I'm going to
give it a go here. It's going to be difficult to adopt from the U .S. foster care
while living abroad. As you probably know, there are two general paths for adopting
from the U .S. foster care system. The first path is to adopt a child that you are
fostering. That entails becoming a foster parent and acknowledging that the goal is
to help heal the birth family so the child can go home. If the child is not able
to go home, then generally speaking, first they'll look for extended family, assuming
they can't find extended family who is able to provide permanency for the child.
They will most often ask the foster parents if they are interested in adopting the
child. I think this path is not an option for you living abroad. It would be close
to impossible to facilitate birth family visits, including visits with siblings and
grandparents, etc. And the goal is to keep the child in their community so that
it's less disruptive in the child's life. It would also be very difficult and
expensive to provide the required monitoring of the foster family who is not living
with an easy driving distance of the agency.
will also be difficult while living abroad, but it is the option that you should
look into further. The kids available for adoption via this route are usually older
or a part of larger sibling groups. The decision of permanency for these kids is
supposed to be based on what's in the best interest of the child. And you might be
fighting an uphill battle to get the child placing agency to think it is in the
child's best interest to be removed, not only from her community, but also from her
country, her culture, her language, et cetera. Another hurdle, and honestly, I am
sorry to be the one throwing so much water on your dream here, but another hurdle
is that until the adoption is finalized, the agency, it's a child's legal guardian,
and they're required to visit and monitor the placement. And this will be difficult
and expensive to do with you living in Denmark. So while I can see a lot of
impediments, I think that theoretically it's possible, And I have certainly heard of
examples of families in Canada adopting foster kids from the upper Midwest. But they
don't face the same hurdles that you're facing living in Denmark. So your question
is how to go about adopting a waiting child from foster care while living in
Denmark? Well, first, you do have a relationship with the agency in the U .S.
because you were a foster parent. So I would start with them to see if they would
be willing to work with you and if they have any kids who are legally free for
adoption and needing a family. You're a known entity and that's going to make it
easier. Second, there are a couple and I might say not enough, but there are a few
agencies that place legally free kids for adoption. The agency is not only looking
at a specific geographic area. Once you apply with them, they can help you find the
right child by looking at many states in the US. An added A complication, yes, one
more here, is that whatever agency you work with will need to be accredited under
the Hague Treaty on Intercountry Adoption to place U .S. kids abroad. Or it's
possible that they can partner with such an agency to facilitate this adoption.
Either way, it does add a complication because most public agencies are not so
accredited. And one other thought, if any of the kids that you were previously
fostering comes back into care and their permanency plan is adoption. And there isn't
an extended family who's gonna be able to step up. The agency might consider you
since you've had a previous relationship with the child. The problems I mentioned
throughout this podcast still exist, but the agency might be more motivated to
consider working through them since you have an established relationship with the
child. I am sorry I don't have any better answers or any better news for you. It
is easier to adopt an infant domestically from the US when living abroad, but from
foster care it's a whole another story. And if anyone in our audience has different
ideas, please send it to me and I'll try to get them back to this questioner. So
again, sorry I don't have better news, but I do hope this has been helpful. And
before everyone leaves, let me remind you that we could really, really,
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